Daddy Pow's
Last BRRRRR

"Good afternoon."

…BRRRRRRRRRRRR…

He walked in eighteen, took the throne with a frown

Owl-faced wizard in a navy-blue gown

Rates at zero and the tendies stayed brown

Held this dumpster-fire economy down

Gaslit a nation with a single damn word

"Transitory" — yeah, you heard what you heard

Printer hit BRRR till our savings got blurred

But we love him anyway — the regards' preferred bird

First-ballot Hall of Fame, carve it in stone

Zero-DTEs trembling at his microphone

Last adult in the room — but the kids comin' home

Brace yourselves, regards… Daddy's leavin' alone

Eight years deep in the casino he ran

Saved the apes from themselves with a thirteen-week plan

String quartet on the Titanic, man

But the band played on while the tendies spanned

Greenspan was a hero till he wasn't, take note

J-Pow's leavin' with the bull market's vote

Gold at all-time, IBB on the float

And the next dude in the chair? Y'all better get a boat

Successor incoming, the rumor mill talks

Fed independence on the auction block

The regards are loaded, the chamber's been cocked

TICK — TICK — TICK goes the doomsday clock

Imagine one last troll — two-hundred basis points

Walk out the door with the middle finger out the joint

"Adios, MoFos" — hat tipped to the mess

That's the legendary exit, that's the one we'd love best

(But he won't…)

(He's too classy…)

(He's our king…)

Run it back, run it back, run it back, run it back…

ONE MORE TIME!

(soft) "Thanks, Mr. Jerome Powell."

(whispered, layered, fading)

"transitory… transitory… transitory…"

[BRRRRRRR fades to silence]